Shaz – Doing it my way

I needed to know what to do to take back control of my life.

I was diagnosed in 1993. HIV changed my life in such a short span of time; everybody and everything changed. Other people were making all of the decisions – I lost control. I’m used to being in control and making decisions for myself. You know, I did my grieving when my partner and I were diagnosed.

I wanted to know how to take care of my children and myself.

I was having a baby; I needed to know about treatment and how we were going to be looked after. I didn’t expect to be treated differently to anyone else. I wanted a doctor who treated me like a person, not a number. There was a lot to having HIV and I needed to know about it. I wanted to know how to take care of my children and myself. What’s to be expected in the
long-term?

I was given a death sentence at the beginning, but I thought there’s got to be more to it. This was my first instinct. The scariest part was I didn’t know what to expect. I wanted to know what to do to take back control of my life.

My way was to try and understand what was happening to my body, the changes that were going to affect our lives, and how it was going to affect my baby. Changes I wouldn’t have made with my other children. I have six children altogether.
My partner closed off, but my approach was to learn more.

My partner closed off completely.

The virus was shut out and we never talked about it. So, my approach to taking back control was to learn more, and find some groups or somebody that knew about HIV. I wanted to meet other positive women.

My motivation is day-to-day experiences

I enjoy each day as it comes with its different challenges. I’ve got my kids to keep me going. I’ve got my good health. I want to watch my five grandchildren grow. My motivation is day-to-day experiences. I thrive on challenges and there’s so much more to learn.

• Keep up to date about your health so you can make informed decisions. Talk to your GP if you have got any questions.